It's getting Tight in here....Hobgoblin edition

The Goblin has really been getting after it these days flip flopping more than a good ole' John Kerry campaign. He starts weeks ago ridiculing the notion that drafting defense on day 1 then states after the combine (and prior to the Jones/Bryant addition) that after talking to scouts that team clearly needs to go defense because of the depth in the draft on that side of the ball. Here's an idea Geoff: do a little research and reading prior to writing 5,000 words of pure drivel then following it up with another 5000 words completely contradictory to your prior article. It gets exhausting.

One of the big topics in Hobgoblin land and Bengaldom in general is the position of tight end. Now, I must admit that I've never understood the obsession. Outside of freak of nature Antonio Gates and studs like Dallas Clark and Jason Witten I don't feel the position is as influential as people like to think. Plenty of teams succeed without an elite blocking/receiving tight end combination. Hobson loves to make excuses wherever possible for inefficiency so the offenses shortcomings last year largely fell on the shoulders of our tight ends and the tragic and truly heartbreaking death of Chris Henry. Reggie Kelly and Ben Utecht were lost for the year during camp and the excuse machine was in full force. I like Kelly. He's a solid, workmanlike guy Marvin loves. But he is far from elite. Utecht has never been a difference maker and probably has more potential to be a Christian rock superstar than in the top 15 statistically for tight ends. It sucked they got hurt but it was not the reason we did not advance in the playoffs.



The platoon of Dan Coates and J.P. Foschi has been much maligned and the Goblin has targeted it as a position to draft in the coming months. He states that signing Kelly needs to be priority number one. Really? Our first priority should be to resign a 33 year old average tight end who is coming off of a missed season for a ruptured Achilles tendon? That's the sort of decision a franchise that does not compete for division championships makes. I want the best for Reggie Kelly but I can guarantee you the New England Patriots would not make that move. Year in and out the Patriots cut ties with fan favorites and stable veterans when it becomes clear that they no longer compete at a level high enough to win.

He goes on to blame the spread offense for killing the tight end position saying that now teams need a receiving tight end and a blocking tight end. If you are a purely receiving tight end, aren't you just a slow, big, and probably bad wide receiver? If a guy can't even chip down on a block then he's not a tight end. He goes on to discuss Greg Olsen of the Bears and that his signing is probably not likely because the Bears just signed another tight end to block thereby supporting the notion that Olsen can't block. He spanks Olsen around a little bit more "I’d hate to spend a second-round pick on Olsen and then find out that he can’t get in Terrell Suggs’ way." Yeah, great logic. Let's use as our example one of the best rushers in the whole damn league. A lot of offensive tackles have problems when Suggs attacks them.

This whole tight end tirade of the Hobgoblin comes just months after he featured an entire article on Aaron Hernandez-a guy who is a softer clone of Chase Coffman. In summation, Hobson is an idiot.

http://www.bengals.com/news/hobson-online/article-1/Hobsons-Choice-Line-dance/4d62d773-cb1a-4e6f-9f93-0e047449a817

Compensation! We want our Compensation!

The Bengals were rewarded handsomely for the departure of TJ, Stacy Andrews, and Eric Ghiaciuc by getting a 3rd and 4th rounder. They are the 96th and 131st picks in the draft. The Cats were the only team to receive a 4th round compensatory pick. The team needs to be productive with these picks as those rounds can produce some real impact players. We will comment on the needs of the draft in a future article.

Grant Wistrom's a Dick!

The two cooks are out at a batchelor party this weekend so there will be no new updates until at least Monday.

I thought I would share a personal batchelor party anecdote in remembrance. As a younger man in college in St. Louis I happened upon Grant Wistrom's batchelor party that ended at a local watering hole called Humphrey's. Grant was there with Kyle Turley and some other players whose names are escaping me at this moment. Anyway, after a few diet cokes I decided I was going to talk to good ole' boy Grant Wistrom. This happened to be a few weeks after the team that shall remain nameless defeated the Seattle Seahawks of whom Grant played for in the Super Bowl. So I say "Hey Grant, I want to let you know that guys were robbed in the Super Bowl but none of it would have mattered if Kimo didn't shred Carson's knee." He replied, "Man, fuck the Cincinnati Bengals." I did not take that comment well and said, "You know what Grant, Fuck You." Immediately after uttering the words, I took a few steps back and showed myself to the door. I quickly called Lippincott's shorts and informed him that I would be starting a blog. It took a while, but here we are.

Oh boy oh boy! It's Roy!

Sadly, after this photo was taken, Roy Williams tackled this old bag by leading with his right forearm to her trachea. He also stole the blue plastic thing in her hand.

But, then again, that's just how Roy Williams plays the game. Physical, hard nosed. . .Any other cliches we can come up with?

The Bengals re-signed Roy Williams over the weekend. And the reason why there has been no word from the pancake kitchen, is because I smell a larger, more formidable article on the Bengals safety issue distilling in Brat's fermenters just down the road. This also will tie-in/lead in, to the the Tight Polyester weighing in on the Bengals' needs in next month's draft.

So many articles and thoughts for our loyal readers that I don't know whether to write all day, go to work, or lie on my sofa and watch Skip Bayless all day.

But, let's get to the point: Even without injuries, a good defense needs three good safeties. Bengals.com is reporting that Williams talked about how he and Crocker "made a good tandem" last year when they were healthy. And maybe that's the case. But the bigger point here is that now Cincy has 3 legit starting safeties in Chinedum, Chris, and Roy. Given the ages of the last two, I would expect that Ndukwe plays as much or more than the other two (and he really played great last season) but the unique talents all three of these fellers bring embolden an already good secondary.

Early preview on a draft thought: Get us a good nickel corner in rounds 2 - 4. Morgan Trent is a future strong safety who is a fierce blitzer, good tackler, and mean coverage guy on the short zone passes. However, Cincinnati needs a third corner to play on 3rd and long downs, because Trent is going on his 5th consecutive year of being entirely uncomfortable in deep coverage. The Bengals are one good corner away from having the best secondary in football.

-The Shorts! Lippincott that is!

He's Incognito!

Richie Incognito descended into Bengaldom disguised as Bobbie Williams and just might walk away with a deal. Just kidding. I was just attempting to make a joke incognito. The truth of the matter is that talks with Williams have stalled but as of now there has not been overwhelming interest in the super solid guard. He is a rock on the line. A guy the team looks to for leadership, guidance, and enthusiasm. He's also 33.

Incognito is in town for a visit but the headbutting psychopath may just be a ploy to let Williams know we have options and will not be afraid to part ways with him if need be. My suspicion is that a deal with Bobbie will get done. Mike Brown loves players that have been with and is loyal to the organization. It may also be consistent with the fact that our scouting department is a group of poorly trained monkeys so we don't like to stray too far from the coop to get our players.

If things do get interesting I would not be surprised signing a guy like Incognito. He's a problem child though most of his problems are on the field in the form of personal fouls and overall lunacy. The Cats also love versatility and the dude can play guard and center. He should also be on the cheap since his troubled past will make most bidders weary of any substantial contract.

No, not Cromartie.

What? You want new thoughts on the Bryant signing? Get outta here. I already gave them to you in an earlier article.

In summation: I would have preferred TO, but signing Bryant avoided the worst possible scenario of relying on a draft pick to fill the role of 1/2 WR in the Bengals' system. Bryant is big and Carson likes big wideouts. Bryant is physical and can help in the run game. Bryant, Chad, Caldwell, and Jones, give Cincinnati a decent receiving corps with significant upside.

All right, fine. I have a few new thoughts, but only because three new pieces of information emerged since my last short round up.

1) Kevin Walter was Cincinnati's number one WR target this offseason. To that, I say. . .What the hell? Not only is he a former Bengal indicating, for the 315th time that Cincinnati's WR scouting department consists of 13 chimpanzees and a bottle of Glenmorangie Scotch. But in a prolific Texans offense, playing opposite one of the best 3 WRs in the game, Walter's best season was 900 yards and 8 TDs in 2008. Picking Jerome Simpson and Chase Coffman make more sense when you realize that Walter was inexplicably ranked ahead of Bryant and TO on their free agent wish list.

2) Carson Palmer was texting Bryant to recruit him. It is funny when multimillion dollar 30 year old athletes communicate the same way 12 year old girls do

3) The money: 4 years and 28 million. It doesn't really mean much until we know how much of the deal is guaranteed money. It seems steep for a player with only a couple of big seasons - but Cincinnati didn't have many options.

Bryant it is...

Word is that Antonio Bryant has just signed a 4 year deal with the Cats. It's safe to say that I am a little disappointed. I suprisingly was starting to get excited for the TO show. Bryant is younger yet far more inconsistent, less accomplished, and has left a similar path of destruction. I dislike the 4 year contract but if he sucks we can just release him.

Here are the career stats:

YEAR TEAM G REC YDS AVG LNG TD FD FUM LOST 2002 DAL 16 44 733 16.7 78 6 32 2 1 2003 DAL 16 39 550 14.1 54 2 27 0 0 2004 CLE 10 42 546 13.0 55 4 25 0 0 2004 DAL 5 16 266 16.6 48 0 12 1 1 2005 CLE 16 69 1009 14.6 54 4 45 1 1 2006 SFO 14 40 733 18.3 72 3 31 0 0 2008 TAM 16 83 1248 15.0 71 7 60 1 1 2009 TAM 13 39 600 15.4 42 4 25 0 0 Career 106 372 5685 15.3 78 30 257 5 4